Breaking news! Possible Zombie Outbreak in the United States of America
The zombieclock has detected a potential outbreak in the United States of America within the small, little known town of Curious Falls in western Arizona.
Latest news - Confirmed cover up - 11/11/2018
Our scientific team on the ground has spent the last several days analysing the samples they have collected from the site where Curious Falls should be located. They have concluded that the town has been completely erased by parties unknown. The erasure of this entire town has been covered up by both the local and the national authorities. The very fact we can find no mention of Curious Falls anywhere online also suggests a more widespread international cover up.
Google censorship?
A cursory search on google for Curious Falls proves this. Below we compare a search in October to a search made in November after the zombieclock predicted event. All mention of Curious Falls has been removed.
We have of course contacted Google for comment and recieved the following message:
"Curious Falls is not a place, Curious Falls has never been a place. Please stop emailing us" - Google spokesperson
We take this as the final confirmation that a truly international coverup has taken place.
Next steps
At this time, we have no further avenues of enquiry we can pursue. Something happened here, and it probably involved a strain of mutated toxoplasmosis, however we do not have the resource to pursue this any further. We have disposed of all of the samples we have taken, after 3 days of interrogation we have also released George the hiker back into the desert. We have no choice but to take the science we have learned here and feed it back into the zombieclock mainframe. Hopefully with the next outbreak we will be able to get here sooner.
Do you know someone from Curious Falls?
We would love to speak to them. Please ask them to Send a mail to ash@zombieclock.com or alternatively visit us at our undisclosed location for some tea, crumpets and unrelenting interrogation.
Scenes on the ground - 08/11/2018
Our scientific team, lead by our head scientist Bill, has finally landed in Arizona. After a gruelling 10 hour trek our team has arrived in the small town of Curious Falls. Bill remembers it well from his childhood, when he used to visit the scenic township as a wee lad.
Unfortunately this place is no longer a scenic township.
WHERE IS CURIOUS FALLS?!?!
Our team is astonished to find that the town is no longer here. It has been completely eradicated. There is no sign of any form of habitation for hundreds of miles in either direction. All we see is tumbleweed, dust and strangely a large amount of feral cats. The team can see no other forms of life, the entire area is eerily quiet. Our team is astonished. Checking the clock mechanics shows that there was an outbreak in this exact location 24 hours ago. Obviously the clock is never wrong, our science is by far the strongest science of them all. But where is the town?? Forensic analysis of the area is inconclusive. It is unlikely that nuclear weapons were used here, but we can rule nothing out at this stage.
Taking samples
Our team has had no choice but to take some samples of the surrounding flora and fauna. To this end, armed with spatulas, a trowel and a high powered tranquiliser rifle with a telescopic sight our team has managed to recover the following samples from the area:
- Soil samples
- Local cacti samples
- A strange leaf that caught Bill's eye
- One of the feral cats
- A passing hiker named George
The samples are safely locked down and are currently being subjected to the finest analysis that science has to offer. Rest assured we will have some answers to this mystery soon.
What Can I do?
We realise this is a distressing situation, we want to get to the bottom of this outbreak as soon as possible. You can help by spreading the word about Curious Falls and the fate that has befallen it. Someone is trying to erase this township. Its up to you to help spread the word.
What is going on? - 07/11/2018
This appears to be an extremely unusual outbreak. Our scientists are, franky, baffled. Zombieclock initially pinpointed an area in the United Kingdom as the source of this outbreak, leading to conjecture that another Buckfast related superBOB epidemic was on our hands. However after a few hours zombieclock changed and alerted us to a mutated toxoplasmosis outbreak in Arizona, USA. This is terrifying stuff, our scientists are virtually running blind at the moment. We have of course scrambled a team to Curious Falls to find out exactly what is going on. We have contacted the US President for comment but have no far recieved no reply. We suspect the beginnings of a cover up taking place.
Where is Curious Falls?
Further disturbing our scientists is the fact that we can no longer locate Curious Falls on Google. Our head scientist, Bill (no relation to Albert Einstein, despite his remarkable similarity in appearance), often used to vacation in the curious little town as a young lad in the 20's. He, along with the rest of our team, are currently travelling to curious falls and are greatly worried for the safety of the gentle townsfolk.
What is Mutated Toxoplasmosis?
Reguar Toxoplasmosis is a parasitic disease caused by Toxoplasma gondii.Infections with toxoplasmosis usually cause no obvious symptoms in adults. Occasionally, people may have a few weeks or months of mild, flu-like illness such as muscle aches and tender lymph nodes. The cause of toxoplasmosis is usually cat feaces. Some cats, in their bid to someday take over the world, will intentionally infect humans and then laugh at the misery of their mild symptoms. It is really best not to think too much about how these cats intentionally infect you. While you sleep.
Mutated toxoplasmosis, however, is a different kettle of fish altogether. Alongside the normal toxoplasmosis symptoms, mutated toxoplasmosis can cause the following:
- Earache
- An irritable bowel
- A strange but nevertheless compelling need to listen to the music of Phil Collins
- A craving for garlic
- Irreversable and total zombification
Strangely the best way to immunise ones self to mutated toxoplasmosis is in being friendly and approachable to all cats. Although outbreaks are rare, this has been found to be the only surefire way to prevent mutated toxoplasmosis zombification